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Men Are Just Simpler and Happier People
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Welcome to RCF - WHF Forum Index -> Quotations and Cliches Add To Bookmarks
Men Are Just Simpler and Happier People
PostPosted: 06/09/2008 2:26 PM Reply with quote
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rb2d2
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Posts 49587
Word Cnt. 2,756,145
BDay Apr 22
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Sex Sex:Female
Joined: Sep 25, 2004
Local time: 9:28 AM
Location: Texas
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NICKNAMES

If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura,
Kate and Sarah.
If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately
refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even
though it's only for $32.50.
None of them will have anything smaller and
none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their
bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

A man will pay $2 for  a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1
for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS

A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving
cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel.
The average number of items in
the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify
more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after
that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS

Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't
looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never
worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can
spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man
marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, answer the phone,
read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and
funerals.

NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow
deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.
She knows about
dental appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears
hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in
the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY FROM ALL THIS

A married man should forget his mistakes.
There's no use in two people
remembering the same thing!




I LOVE the one about offspring!


hysterical2
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Re: Men Are Just Simpler and Happier People
PostPosted: 06/09/2008 8:24 PM Reply with quote
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mojo
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these are great!
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