| Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/04/2005 5:08 PM |
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Joined: Oct 28, 2005
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Location: New Zealand
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A lonely person
in a vast emptiness
an unsure child
in a knowing land
a lovesick fool
in an uncaring place
a little girl
struggling in an adults world
she needs help
but no one sees
she cries out
but no one hears
she weeps bitterly
as she realises the hideous truth...
she has grown up at last
© Kirsty 2005 |
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| Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/04/2005 5:25 PM |
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Joined: Sep 25, 2004
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Location: Texas
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LOL. Boy, that had a punch, really hits home! Thanks, Rizzo, that's wonderful!
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| Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/06/2005 1:00 AM |
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Joined: Sep 25, 2004
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Hideus truth? I hope she doesn't see it that way. Childhood can be great but adulthood can be even better...
You sure expose a lot of your emotion in your poetry Rizzo. I wish I had that kind of non-mechanical talent...
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| Re: Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/06/2005 10:27 AM |
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I'm glad to see your poetry... although sad... expressing it can be the first attempt to recovery... And we're enjoying it.... |
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| Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/06/2005 2:39 PM |
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Yes, I hope we can see more of your work, Rizzo. You have a lot of talent and it would be a shame if you didn't share it with us...
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| Re: Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/08/2005 9:37 PM |
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Skyhawk |
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Joined: Jan 03, 2005
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Hmm... this is a wonderful poem. Reminds me of one I wrote a while back.
Tell me, was there a particular reason that you refrained from using punctuation? I find it very effective.
How old are you, if you don't mind me asking...?
I love your style, and the last line really pulls it all in.
Truly a wonderful ending.
Thank you. |
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| Re: Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/09/2005 8:32 PM |
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Joined: Oct 28, 2005
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Some of my poems have punctuation, some don't. I find that sometimes it detracts from what you're actually trying to say. Sometimes it helps!
27
Thank you for your kind comments! |
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| Re: Emptiness | |
Posted: 11/10/2005 8:33 PM |
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Joined: Jan 03, 2005
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Hmmm.... 27.. ok. Thank you. |
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| Information | |
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